What in the world was I thinking moving to a new home with a 21 mo. old, 4 yr. old, and 34 weeks pregnant! After looking for a home for 2.5 years, we finally found it, and now became the only option to make the move. I had no idea what I was in for.
Enter complete overwhelm! Add in my hubbs starting a new job in January, which left me with just about all of the move duties; we’re taking on a demo/renovation in our new house in addition to all of inspection "to do's" being done as we moved in; I'm still working; figuring out what to do with my kiddos during the move; and oh yeah, I have 3 professional certifications up for Recert all due before this 3rd baby arrives in 5 weeks. It gives me ogeda just thinking about it! Now add my arch nemesis, Type A Perfectionist personality that I've been working so hard to tame in to the mix, and we've got an all-out Mommy meltdown ready to blow at any given moment! Which, by the way, already happened three times. I know we all have a load to carry, and that it’s how we carry it that makes all the difference. Well, I'm realizing I'm not carrying this load very well at all.
I'm no stranger to how mental/emotional stress can break down the body. I've felt and believe in the saying that stress (in its many shapes and sizes) is responsible for 99.9% of all disease. I've learned many hard lessons well, and try to do my best to keep stress in check, but even then, the stress monster seems to be winning this game of "as my world turns." Last week I had two anxiety bouts that left my heart palpitating, my big, prego belly contracting, and me seeing spots of what could only be described as the gold pieces in my college fave, Goldschlager. Fun then, not now! The mental/emotional exhaustion has sent my body in to a tailspin of distressing signs and crazy symptoms. I’m like a ticking time bomb ready to flip in any given moment. My 4 yr. old told me it scares him when I keep getting “frusterated” and I yell and scream at them. Right into tears I went. This makes me feel horrible! His little voice of wisdom was all I needed to kick me into major stress management mode. I knew if I didn't get this even semi under control, I would continue to put myself and my family’s health and wellbeing at risk, and this chick would end up on bed rest or early labor. So into stress recovery mode I went.
My 1,2,3 Stress Recovery Strategy
#1 Keep my blood sugar stable and stay hydrated. This is a must! Especially when prego. If these two things go out of balance, shit starts flowing downhill quick. Now, I’ve got my Mommy food bag fully packed with goodies on the go, and my trusty water bottle filled at all times tracking my “fill it five” goal. Stressful times call for more H2O. I have to fill my 17oz bottle 5 times/day to know I’ve hit my “hydrate for sanity” quota!
#2 Love my body green! Greens balance, nourish, and energize in addition to all kinds of other good things for the body and mind, and oh what a difference they’ve made in this situation. I’ve got my Suja Essentials Mighty Greens drink ready to go at all times, making sure I down at least 1/day until the dust literally settles in our new home, and my Vitamix is ready to make a comeback.
#3 Take Frequent “Breath Breaks.” Whenever I feel myself going down the path toward Mommy meltdown, and even in between for prevention sake, I’m doing my best to pause, take 5 slow deep breaths through my nose, then carry on. I even have my 4 yr. old on Team Breathe. I asked him to say, “Mommy, I love you, and take 5 slow deep breaths,” every time he sees me getting frustrated. I’ll take all the help I can get! So far, so good.
Us Moms are always expected to chew more than we can bite off, put on our superwoman cape in any given moment to save the day, and come out smelling like roses on a hot, stressful day. I’m not superwoman. I don’t want to be. I’m not perfect. I’m done trying to be. I just want to be at my best so I can give it in whatever moment I’m in. I’m done looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. I want to find, see, and feel the light in the tunnel regardless of how horrible and stressful the moment is. I had a dream last night (that I actually remembered) that the world was coming to an end, and I had to say goodbye to my 4 yr. old and husband knowing our last moments were filled with intense moments of yelling and frustration, and not of love and laughter. I was begging for just one more moment to make up for it, but there were none. I woke up out of this dream both choked up and grateful that God sent me this message in plenty of time to make some positive changes. I keep this dream close to my heart to remind me that life has no guarantees, especially of time, and that the only way to fill a moment with life is to fill it with love. So, with love, and a little more patience with myself and the process of life, I carry on willing to learn and grow as I go.